Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Phil's Boring Website

This is a new blog, so we're cleaning out the archives which are just full of Phil. Here's a letter to the editor that was published on January 13, 2009:
Conservative member's website is generic

Along with many local readers, I have viewed the recent opinions expressed about our new MP, and read the misleading and generic holiday newsletter he mailed out at taxpayer expense.

Now I feel compelled to contribute to the debate after looking at his new website, which is nearly identical to the websites of many other Conservative MPs, and which contains no content concerning Brant whatsoever.

The fact that Phil McColeman would be an inaccessible and voiceless representative was foreshadowed during the election campaign when Stephen Harper deigned to visit our fair city, and curious citizens who were not on a preapproved "guest list," and/or were not card-carrying Conservatives, were turned away at the event's gate.

I am wondering when Mr. Mc- Coleman will publicly respond to these accusations. During the last electoral campaign, former MP Lloyd St. Amand politely responded to public criticism in these pages.

If McColeman fails to respond, one can only assume that he is "too busy" either sifting through propaganda from Ottawa, or chewing on his Harper-given ball gag.

Ryan MacIsaac, Brantford

A quick look showed that in fact the McColeman's website was and is nearly identical to those of other Conservative MPs Dave Van Kersteren, David Tilson, Ben Lobb, Greg Rickford, Peter Braid, Bev Shipley, Gord Brown… and these are just a few from Ontario! All of these websites feature prominently the same generic links to big-time policy topics like ENVIRONMENT and ECONOMY, and, oddly, a SOVEREIGNTY button that links to Indian and Northern Affairs Canada. What I gather from this is that, under the Conservatives, Indian and Northern Affairs should be more concerned with Russians planting a flag on the ocean floor than with, say, the over 80 native communities that don't have safe drinking water. But then, the Conservative government clearly perfers significant promises to actual action.

But back to Phil's website. When the above letter was published, Phil's website featured a generic note that appeared to be written by him, on the topic of "a great option… the new Tax-Free Savings Account" (which has even been criticized in the National Post). The depth of the economic content and prose seemed to be a little bit beyond the capacity of Phil the Handyman, and sure enough a quick Google search proved that it was just more generic drivel pumped out by the Conservative propaganda machine.

What's most interesting in this story, though, is that the exact same day that the above letter to the editor was published, Phil reacted by putting local content on his website, starting with a heart-warming brief about his visit to an area school:
Greenbrier School in Brantford
January 13, 2009

Phil meets with the grade 4 & 5 class of Greenbrier School in Brantford 01/12/09 to discuss the democratic process.

The terrible irony of Phil discussing "the democratic process" with these students is that his holy leader Stephen Harper had just weeks earlier completely undermined Canadian democracy, if not in law then in principle. One can reasonably assume that Phil McColeman taught these kids such timeless lessons as:
  • How to act like a bully even when the majority of people don't like you.
  • How to run away from the same problems you created in the first place.
  • How to alienate 23% of your classmates in a single stroke, or 23% of Canadian voters (Qu├ębec) if you're a federal leader.
  • How to lie about budget surpluses, or by analogy, how to lie that your parents are a lot richer than they really are.
  • How to take credit for other people's work.
Let's just hope that the teachers at Greenbriar School don't have to face students asking for a proroguation of class because they don't get along with the other kids.

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